As many of my readers know, I lost my second father, my stepfather, Martin, two years ago today. I thought it only fitting that I should share some of my memories on this occasion.

So please allow me to present to you

13 Photos of My "Other Dad"


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1) I remember taking this photo when Martin and Mom visited Italy in 2006. There was a spot in the castle of Fontanellato I called "My Magic Window" because it lent itself to making great photos. I could always make a perfect portrait of someone if they sat there.

Naturally, this is one of my photos of Martin taken in that window, overlooking the moat.

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2) In Firenze, I told Martin "Look shocked at the prices!" in the Prada display window.

He obliged, of course.

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3) One of my favorite photos, ever. Martin and Mom in Correggio.

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4) In Lago Maggiore, Martin filmed and photographed just about everything.

I repeatedly sneaked shots of him doing so.

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5) At one point during their Italian visit, both my families got together for dinner. This is one of my favorite photos of all time.

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6) Martin was always up for just about anything. He was spontaneous and fun, and prone to, ah... the occasional outburst.

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7) Martin was also open to direction. His sense of humor was surprisingly bawdy at times, too - which was a revelation to people who only knew him in his role as a Methodist minister.

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8) He was also unstintingly supportive of his family, and always encouraged us to live up to our potential. Even when we got angry at him for it.

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9) He was also loved animals. This photo shows Martin in Virginia in the mid-eighties with one of our kittens, the runt of the litter, whom I had dubbed "Stinky". (She wasn't.)

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10) Martin and Mom in Lake Lure, NC, 2003. This photo was taken by the lake during Alle's first-ever visit to the States to meet me. Martin took us for a drive that meandered over the mountains, and that became something of a tradition over the following years.

The highlight of the day: Martin created "The Fudge Song", snippets of which are sung to this day.

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11) Another mid-eighties photo from Virginia. This is Martin performing on the stage with a gospel singing group he was friends with.

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12) You'd never believe it, but back in 2003, Martin wasn't entirely enthused that I was going to play host to someone I'd met on the internet. He changed his mind as soon as he met Alle, and it was only a matter of time before they got along quite swimmingly.

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13) Martin had a substantial impact on the community around his churches as well as his friends and family.

We didn't get off to the smoothest start when I was younger, but over the years we came to a point of understanding I would never have thought possible. I only now realize just how much he loved and accepted me, and I'm sure he knew (and knows) how much I loved him.

His love and caring for my family - especially, of course, for my mother, but also for my siblings and and their families - meant the world to me.

I love you and miss you, Marty-man. Thank you for understanding me when you could, and for guiding me the best you could. I'm only sorry I made it so hard for you to do so.

I'm a better person for it, now.