13 "Do You Know That...?" Factoids

So. You thought the slogan "Have a happy period" was bad? It used to annoy me, too, until I got to Italy and was confronted by the rather patronizing tone of the marketing of feminine products here.

Not content with using a simplistic slogan to make their point, the LINES (pronounced "LEE-nez") product line includes a series of "Lo sai che?" - "Do you know that...?" - factoids on the packaging of some of their items.

Since last Tuesday was International Women's Day, I thought I'd share with you some of the factoids that LINES thinks women need to know about our bodies. Here now, I'd like to present:

13 'Do You Know That...?' Factoids

(I'll take the first quotes directly from the item pictured.)

1) Do you know that 60% of women suffer from premenstrual syndrome?

Well, hurrrrr....Durrrr... Really? Not exactly a newsflash, is it?

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2) Do you know that... in the premenstrual phase even positive effects may occur, such as increased sex drive and creativity?

Well, that explains a lot for me. We'll pretend I hadn't noticed that on my own. Like most women I know.

3) Do you know that a herbal tea such as calendula (marigold) is a good remedy against water retention?

Or, you know, just drinking a healthy amount of water. Like we're supposed to, anyway.

4) Did you know that the cycle can be influenced by factors outside of nature?

This is one of the quotes which made me say "Well, duh!" out loud when I read it.

5) Do you know that during the cycle a very common behavior is a desire for sweet foods?

*Headdesk*

Do you know it's a common need to want a sweet treat during the menstrual period?

What, you mean... Like chocolate or something? Which you mention several times in other "factoids", such as:

Did you know that chocolate stimulates the production of serotonin, the hormone of happiness, which is lacking during the cycle?

I reckon that answers that. Although chocolate generally has that effect any time - not just during menstruation.

6) Did you know that a thorough and proper genital hygiene is essential during the menstrual cycle?

This one is so important - I guess Italian women don't know this basic fact? - they actually repeat it with some rewording:

Do you know it's good practice to enhance the normal hygienic practices during menstruation? (emphasis mine)

(Here, the website goes  on to add: "Menstruation is an event with the potential for polluting the presence of stagnant blood and secretions, it is necessary to increase the frequency of daily washing underwear and use of strong acid cleaners.")

'Cause, you know, you wouldn't have figured out that you needed to clean yourself up on your own. And hey, don't forget to use "strong acid cleaners" to make sure your clothes are clean too*, okay?

*Edited to add this note: Evidently, I went a little astray while interpreting this one. The "strong acid cleaners" was not referring to detergents to clean clothes, but rather to feminine cleansers - which is to say, douches. Yeah. I didn't think that one could get worse, but it did. (Thanks to my brave hubby for not being afraid to point that one out.)

So, be sure to clean your nasty hoochies, y'all! Aren't you glad LINES was here to remind you to do this?

7) Do you know that a cold compress on the eyes relieves menstrual syndrome headaches?

Did you know that dropping a brick on your toe hurts?

8) Do you know that with a simple hot water bottle you can relieve pain in the belly?

Did you know that a simple warm bath can relieve menstrual cramps?

That's right up there with number seven, no?

9) Do you know that nuts can give you a natural relaxing effect?

Okay, they meant nuts like almonds, walnuts and peanuts - but I couldn't help laughing at that one.

10) Do you know the term 'lunatic' referring to a woman comes from the beliefs that a woman's life is influenced by the moon?

Yeah, I think most of us know that now. And thanks for bringing that up, by the way.

11) Did you know that during the menstrual cycle it is recommended to wear comfortable and breathable clothing?

Aw, geez. Why didn't I think of that? That's where I've been going wrong my whole life.

12) Do you know that pre-menstrual syndrome can also be affected by stress?

Oh. My. God. Why has no-one told me this before? ALERT THE MEDIA!!! Or, you know... Dig yourself out from the rock you've been living under.

13) Do you know that, statistically, premenstrual syndrome affects mainly women who work outside the home? (emphasis mine)

This is the one which sent me raving (post-menstrually, thank you very much) to my husband, and inspired this post. I found this one particularly insulting. Why?

Because a) I know plenty of women who were/are affected by PMS who were stay-at-home mothers and wives, and b) I found the underlying message here to be that working "outside the home" (and how many women really have a choice in the matter, especially if they're not married?) was a bad thing. As in "You bring the stress on yourself, woman, by not staying where you should be."

I won't say I wasn't being a tad oversensitive. There's just something in the tone of that "fact" which seems to me to be incredibly condescending.

For what it's worth, my husband agreed after he read it for himself.

Yes, I know there are more than thirteen factoids collected up there.






But some of them were too hard to resist sharing.




















And I'm never terribly good at resisting impulses, I guess.






























But you know me...


























That's just how I am.

Woo-hooo!

Ciao for now!